virgo

by Gudadalupe Lagunas
(AZ, USA)

I am a widow. Those are some words that are not for me or I had in the back of my mind for 50 years. I lost my husband about 6 months ago. The grieving process I have been aware of for many years as I experienced the deaths of other close and not so close family and friends. It happened to everyone else but not to my husband. At the time of his death he had many health issues. Some were a product of a lifestyle that doctors say are contraindicated if you want to live a healthy life. In other words he was doing things his way just like millions of other people. He lived life pretty much his way.
By some freak happening he was diagnosed with Parkinsons at age 59. He suffered with this as well for 10 years. I was the caregiver all that time and I also worked outside my home. I have two grown children, grandkids and two wonderful additional family members I like to refer to as my daughter and son who are married to my children.
I have always believed that putting things in writing is good "therapy for what ails you". I did it when our family was going through some hard emotionally charged times and I for one didn't think the family unit would survive. We survived and came out all the wiser for having gone through it together.

My husband death 6 months ago was unexpected somewhat.
I knew the disease would get worse but not when it would take him from us. So you might say we did expect it sometime, somehow and took it one day at a time. Some days were harder than others to cope with. The bad days did take their toll on all of us and especially me.

Now that he is gone I have been going through all the feelings and reactions that a grieving person goes through. I found this website today and since I like to put things in writing I felt compelled to do it here. To whomever takes time to read this I thank you. This is going to be a good thing.