Who do I call now?
I was my mothers primary caregiver for a couple of years. One day, while I was at work, she fell and hit her head. That was in January 2012 and nothing was ever the same. She was diagnosed with dementia and could no longer be left alone during the day. I am a single mom that works two jobs, all I could think was "what am I going to do?" Although I have 3 siblings, they thought it was my job because I had been living with her and caring for her, so I needed to find a solution. My nephew stepped up and took care of his Grandma for a few months during the day. My daughter then quit her job and stayed with her Grandma until she passed away December 17, 2012.
I was holding her hand when she died and had been staying home with her the last few days of her life. My mom was my best friend and the void that has been left is unbearable. My heart is broken. I thought that I would be "over" it by now (it has been over 9 months) but some days I just don't know how I am going to make it. I have not dealt with my grief but have become a workaholic instead. My dad passed away 6 years ago and I, along with my mom, had been taking care of him as well. The difference is that then I had my mom to lean on and cry with and talk to, now I feel so alone. Financially things are horrible, my relationship with my oldest daughter has suffered, and I just feel lost, with no direction. I often go to the cemetery and ask her "Who do I call now, Mom?"