Will ever get over it

by Staci Fletcher
(huntsville alabama)

I'm 25 years old and I lost my mom a month before my 23rd birthday. To stomach cancer. My mom was my everything knowing she was passing away started my pain. Every since then I've giving up on life
. Three years later my father pass away a month later, a month after that I found out I'm pregnant. All I could think about was my baby doesnt have any grandparents on my side. But, I thank god every day for my son (Jermarcus).

Comments for Will ever get over it

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Mar 05, 2011
For Stacy
by: Mari

I am very sorry for your loss Stacy. A mom is a precious person in one's life. Your feelings of grief are completely natural. Then you lost your dad too. I cannot say this is a loss one completely recovers from but please do not give up on life.

You have come to the right place Stacy. There are a lot of wonderful people on this board to listen and care. It really helps to express what you are feeling.

You know Stacy, your parents are with the Lord. You will see them again.
As for your babies having no grandparents what I would do is have your babies dedicated to the Lord at church. Then say,''Jesus, these are your babies.'' You will also have a protector, a care giver, a blessing for your babies.Your parents are safe with the Lord.

Please take care of yourself and have faith that things will get better. Tell yourself that you are not going to give up. Today starts a new day. Ask God to be with you. You can do it. Your mom and dad would be sad if they knew you were sad.
Right now you are going through the rain but ''this too shall pass.'' Keep posting. We care. Jermarcus is a blessing and that is sure a nice name you gave him.

Mar 05, 2011
The art of living...sometimes surviving
by: Hope

My mother died after a 20 battle with Alzheimers. A week before, my father found out that he had cancer and had to put my mother in a nursing home so that he could get radiation treatment.

When she died it was almost a relief that she was out of pain and suffering. She had not known who I was for quite some time and my father was more her nurse than her husband.

Many of us have been in that situation but that is another story being caretakers. Remember that my father took care of her in sickness and health till death did part them.

Gee got up to get a cuppa coffee and forgot my point. Oh yes my story of grief and how I dealt with it. My Father did beat the cancer with radiation that time. But a 2nd cancer came this time more vicious and required chemo. I took him to his treatments it make him not only sick but, changed his entire life. He beat that cancer too but it took from him. He had something where his blood pressure would drop when standing, he became weak in body but Never in mind. He was always positive and always found things to keep him occupied.

Even when he went to a nursing home so that he did not have to "impose" on us. His choice, not ours. He continued to paint, and inspire me with his "the glass is always full" attitude.

When he died it was almost 2 years after hospice came in expecting him to only live 3. It was his attitude that kept his body stronger than it was supposed to be.

To get to the end of this story. When He died I was my husbands caretaker. I did not have the time to properly grieve his death. I had to keep on keeping on.

When My husband died I grieved both deaths heavily. I could not function day to day and having a child felt at the time like a HUGE hindrance. I could not take care of me, much less an 11 year old. People kept saying at least you have a child to care for. I secretly thought they were nuts. I had to keep my strong facade for him. Broke down then got myself together so many times. How could my child be my superglue?

But he was, he leans on me heavily, scared that I will leave him like his father did dying.
Now it is just him and I against the world.

Some times it feels suffocating how much he clings on me for dear life. I used to call him my klingon. But really without him I would have had nothing to get out of bed for.

I was forced to be a mom and not a great one at that. But you know that those that have "passed"
are looking down on us protecting us and giving us the strength to carry on and raise our family.

They are still watching over us and you are making them both proud...

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