Will this pain EVER end?
by Desiree Taylor
I lost my mother on November 14,2011.I miss my best friend, everyday I still think I need to call her and let her know how my day is going, and then I realize. My mother had a laugh that was contagious,and a voice you could hear for miles. She loved to make me happy. Being that I was her only child. My father passed when I was 6 yrs old. She dedicated her life to me, and working to take care of me as a single parent. We never had much but what we did have she had worked very hard to get. On October 24 my mother became ill, taking her to the nearest hospital "thinking" its the FLU. To my surprise she was in septic shock from a horrible UTI immediatly admitted in intensive care. Within 11 days things began to improve she was moved into the step-down unit. On the "road to recovery" I thought. Until a horrible rash appeared on her back, legs and arms, and over the next 2 days continued to spread. She was then transported to another facility for better care. That was when I was faced with a room of 50 doctors it seemed. All explaining to me what it could be, what it should be. My mother was my ROCK I looked to her for support, love, and guidence. In 35 years I dont think I ever really stood on my own two feet, and here I am. Feeling like a child, faced with so many issues, people, and decisions. Within 10 days my mother had passed away from complications of an allergic reaction to the medications she was given. She died a HORRIBLE and PAINFUL death. I know that we are ALL going to pass in this world its our fate. I have accepted that. But the suffering that goes on is what I am having a hard time understanding. I dont understand why? WHY did it have to be so horrible ? I miss her everyday. People keep saying it will get better, but it has'nt. Thank you for letting me share my grief.