You`ll miss me when I`m gone

by Lee
(Birmingham. West Midlands, UK)

My Mother was taken into hospital on Feb 24 2013 with breathing difficulties and after hours of tests and x-rays she was diagnosed with severe pnuemonia.

Over the next 2 weeks I watched her condition get worse. She developed mouth and throat ulcers so she could not eat, only drink. The Doctors had her on antibiotics drips every day and glucose drips because she was not eating.

I watched the strong woman who was always there for me turn into a fraile whisper of the woman she once was. It was heart breaking to see my mom and friend slowly slipping away and I was helpless to do anything about it except comfort her.

Everyday for 2 weeks I would visit her after work and would sit with her for hours even though some days she did not know I was there with her. One of the Doctors asked to speak with me in private and he said I have to be honest. There is a chance your mother won`t survive the treatment so I am trying to prepare you for the worst. I said thank you and went back to sit with mom.

Mothers day was only a couple of days away and the family was planning visiting her. But on Sunday 10th March 2013 at 5.30am on Mother`s day I recieved a phone call to say that my mom had sadly passed away in her sleep. Her suffering was over. I got dressed and went to the hospital to say my goodbye.

She looked so peaceful lying there. I sat with for 2 hours waiting for the Doctor to arrive to pronounce time of death. I kissed her goodbye and left. Her cremation was 6 days later, it was a loverly service.

Mom always use to say to me, " you`ll miss me when I am gone". I always use to joke about it, but the truth is she was right. Its now 10th Feb 2014 11 months since is passed on and I miss her everyday. I miss her smile, the sound of her voice and her warped sense of humour. She was a gentle and caring, a real home maker.

Rest in peace mom, always with lots of love xxxx

Comments for You`ll miss me when I`m gone

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Feb 12, 2014
You`ll miss me when I am gone
by: Lee

Thank you all for your kind words of support. I know I am not alone with the loss of a loved one. I know they say time heals all wounds but some wounds run too deep. Mom always try to teach me how to survive on my own. She showed me how to cook, how to use a washing machine, how to iron, how to make a bed and I learn t it so well, its all like second nature now. I have mom to thank for teaching me to cope on my own.

I always believed mom would live forever, someone who would always be there for me when I needed advice or a shoulder to cry. Each day I get up and draw strength knowing she is watching over me and would want me to carry on the best I could.

Also I have finding difficult to go through her belongings. We have been using our local shop for years, We know the staff and they even came to her funeral. Before mom passed she said she wanted her things to go to the shop so they could raise money for charity, so I kept her wish.

But they are some things I can`t part with, too many memories. Life does go on and so will I.
I miss her everyday and I thank her for my life.
Rest in peace Mom. xxxxxxx

Feb 12, 2014
You'll miss me when I'm gone
by: Doreen UK

Lee I am sorry for your loss of your dear mother. You can draw on the strength your mother gave you as she nurtured you. Don't think because your mother has passed away that you will not be able to cope with life when she is gone. My mother passed 11yrs ago on 20th March 2003. I miss her, but I draw on the strength she put in me and I feel as if she is with me guiding me. I also draw on the strength of God who gave me my mother and it is to God I look to for my strength for each day.
There is coming a day when we will not only die but this world will pass away and we will live in the land God is building for us now. WE will be re-united with our loved one's and live forever in a peaceful land where there will be no more death, tears, crying, pain, sorrow, etc. Because all these things will pass away. WE can all look forward to our death with renewed HOPE of eternal life. Be this according our Faith. May God guide you through life and comfort you with His Peace.

Feb 11, 2014
I miss my mum to.
by: sonya mcknight

Hi I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum to.

My mum has been gone 2 years on the 21 January this year and it still hurts now as much as it did back then.

I feel like this when it comes to the small things I miss about my mum like you say her smile face commenting on me sometimes that is the struggle of losing my mum has done to me.

Hi if it gets to much for you talk to a grief counsellor it helped me and still is to this day. I go to ongoing support now.

Take Care.

Feb 11, 2014
i also feels the same!!!
by: Anonymous

my mother died on 28th Feb 2013... and i felt just the same as you described.. my mum also used to say these words " You`ll miss me when I`m gone" but i always used to make joke of it...i miss her, and will always love her till my last breath...


Feb 11, 2014
miss me
by: Jolynn

Lee, I am so sorry you lost your dear mother. She sounded like a beautiful person. What a sad story. How quickly our lives can change forever. I too feel very close to my mom. She is 83 and still going strong but she has emphysema and her breathing is getting worse. I am terrified of being without her. She's been my best friend and has loved me unconditionally. No one can replace our moms. My 26 yr old son died a year ago. He was an officer in the Marines training to be a fighter pilot. The grief I feel from losing him is unbelievable and excruciating. Grief is hard work and exhausting. Remember all the good times you and your mom shared and maybe if we are lucky, we will be reunited with our loved ones one day.

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